How Not To Make A Reuben

I love me a Reuben sandwich. It’s really the sauerkraut that I crave. Cabbage rocks! And sour (saur) cabbage (kraut) makes hotdogs and sandwiches sing… krautrock? I’m also a BIG fan of sauces on sandwiches. The thousand island-type or Russian dressing on a Reuben appeals to my sweet and sour tooth.

I like to order Reuben’s when I’m at delis or restaurants that don’t have vegetarian options. I just order the sandwich without the corned beef. What I get is loads of warm sauerkraut smothered with melted Swiss cheese between toasted rye bread slathered with dressing.

Even better is a Reuben with tempeh! Hold up, hold up! Not always.

Take the Reuben that I ordered for the Natural Goodness Market in Center City Philly the other day. Natural Goodness is a small health food market with a kitchen that serves sandwiches and hot foods. I had only ten minutes on the parking meter, so stopped in to grab a sandwich to go. I chose the Reuben with tempeh.

Um, what are the ingredients in a Reuben?

Corned beef – We’re substituting tempeh. The tempeh was straight up out of the package – not seasoned, cooked, or warm.

Sauerkraut – Usually lots of it, but not in this case. My hankering for sauerkraut was not even tickled.

Thousand Island-type dressing – A sauce should say something, pop in your mouth. Their sauce was weak.

Swiss Cheese – Absent! Not no nothin’!

Rye Bread – Seven grain bread? I’m sure they use it for every sandwich on the board. That’s cheap. And it wasn't toasted.

Extras? – No, tomatoes, sprouts, and lettuce don’t come with Reuben’s, but, since you gave it to me, do you think I could get something besides the rib of the lettuce and the top of the tomato?

The person who made my sandwich obviously didn’t care one iota about a Reuben, or food in general. Just because you’re a health food store doesn’t mean you can get away with such things. Food should taste good and somewhat represent what you advertise.

It’s 2006! Meals at health food stores were bland and nasty 10 to 15 years ago. You’ve got competition now. Compete!

Natural Goodness Market and Cafe
2000 Walnut Street, Philadelphia, PA 19103
Phone: 215-977-7749
Mon-Fri. 9a.m.-7p.m., Sat.10a.m-6p.m., Sun.-closed

5 comments:

matt said...

Watch out for that other veggie place in the terminal. I've have a couple of pathetic experiences there as they struggle to serve or care. You'll be lucky if they have what you want as well. The last veggie steak I had there was bland yet messy and the smoothly was more of a milky juice. I've learned my lesson and won't be going back.

Crystal & Ryan - Café Cyan said...

That's such a bummer. I love reubens, but that one looks bunk!

Btw - I found out that most of the people who play on my new hire's cricket team are all IT workers, so not sure if you know any programmers, but they might know of a local team. He said there were like 70 teams that play informally around the Twin Cities. Crazy underground cricket action!

Oh yeah...funny sidenote: I told one of my friends that we were going to a cricket match and he thought I meant that crickets fought each other like a chicken fight! Haha.

-Crystal

Melody said...

That is one, sad reuben. I hate when vegetarian food is like that because not only does it suck for the person wanting something good, but it turns people off to vegetarianism.

Anonymous said...

That is one stingy health food store! I would cross town to go to Essene any day. Also, products are so much cheaper at Trader Joe's and even Whole foods, which isn't saying much. The employees don't seem very happy and that also tells you something about the management. I for one, will never step foot in there again after my daughter burned her hand in a neighboring store, Beverly Stokes refused to sell me a cup of ice... for a six year old with burned fingers!!! (Tap water was not cool enough that day and they had a whole bag of it in their freezer!) Then I read her "Founder's Letter," on their website that talked about their main values of "community responsibility" and supporting "cruelty-free," products. That lady is not only a hypocrite, she is just plain mean!

Leslie said...

I ordered a reuben once because I was so bored with this current cafe menu that I'd been forced to visit for the past 2 years and man was it n-a-s-t-y. I ending up not only with bad indigestion/gas but a horrid canker sore that last longer than one of the ones I've had in recent memory. Now its also important to note that this place (coughs *Century Cafe in Crystal City, Virginia*) is notorious for making horrid sandwiches and I almost never order a sandwich when I dine there unless it a hamburger. Looking back, man was a desperate to even try this sandwich.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...